October 17, 2009

Do I Need a Job to Find a Girlfriend?

(Reprinted from http://www.truelovedirect.com/do-i-need-a-job-to-find-a-girlfriend)

Short answer: no, but you need a job to keep a girlfriend.

That’s not exactly true, of course. Money is not everything and should definitely not be a factor in choosing a mate. Many women do not care about a man’s salary or what possible gifts he can give to her. That is a great quality to look for in a woman—and a potential girlfriend: the lack of superficial values. However, there are lots of reasons why you do need a job to keep a girlfriend.

Quite simply, a job shows that you work for your money. You are not a spoiled brat living off a trust fund. You are not mooching off of your parents. You pay for your own living expenses, handle your debts, and hopefully, even save for a rainy day. This shows you possess the basest form of adult responsibility to a woman.

A job shows a woman that you have ambitions or career goals. Maybe your current job as a grocery store cashier isn’t your life’s dream…but it could be that you are gaining experience to become a storeowner yourself someday. Dreams very rarely come true without a little work on your part. A woman with goals of her own will likely be put off by a man who appears to drift through life aimlessly.

Maybe you’ve been working at your current job for five months—or maybe five years. Either way, this is a way for a woman to gauge your stability (and to even use it as a relationship gauge). What is your work history like? Do you have a history of one-month-long assignments before you were fired? Did you quit as soon as the job lost its appeal or got too hard? If so, that may send up a red flag to a woman who is looking for commitment. How will she know you will stick out a relationship if you can’t even stick out a job?

Finally, a job shows that you’re capable. You’re capable of taking care of yourself, of keeping a job, of carrying yourself as a mature adult. This is especially important if you hope to one day get married, have a family with this woman, to buy a house. If you don’t even work, how will you achieve these milestones? Moreover, a job displays your skill set, what you’re good at. Productive skills are hard to find in the guy who lays around his parents’ basement all day.

More concretely (and with the near future in mind), without a job you will likely be short of cash at any given time. What will you do on dates? What if your new girlfriend wants to go bowling, but you’re broke? How will you celebrate her birthday? While money is certainly not essential to finding love, a boyfriend who either forces you to pay for him or holds you back from participating in fun activities is bound to become a burden very quickly.

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