June 4, 2008

The parenting schedule is getting confusing and I'm a bad mother.

I can't FUCKING believe I did this.

So, I woke up late, jumped out of bed, raced to get ready. I went downstairs and reached down to grab my purse and leave. Then I saw Kayden's shoes. In my half-asleep delirium, I stared at them, thinking, "He only has one pair of shoes...what the hell is he wearing at Scott's house right now?" I stood there for about a full minute and then I remembered that he was actually home...not at Scott's, like I had thought. I ran back upstairs and woke him up and got him ready.

But, jesus, I feel so guilty. What if I had actually left the house and gone to work?! Now, Kayden's at an age where he could make himself some food, put movies on and such. He would probably be fine all alone. However, he would have been so scared to wake up and find himself alone in the house. And we don't have a home phone, so he wouldn't know how to get ahold of me.

Ugh. ::shaking head::

I know I'm pretty much retarded when I'm half-asleep, but this really takes the cake. Plus, it's hard to get into a routine when he goes to his dad's house on random nights like this.

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